Friday, August 17, 2007

Into the Brink

I have a few posts currently in the works…but seeing as I like to proof-read and edit things, they will take a little longer to get up. I figured however that there might be another long lapse in posting simply because I am about to take the plunge.

This post is an assortment of my most recent thoughts mainly concerning the start of school.

Talking to some of my other friends going through similar transitions, it is nice to realize that feeling out of sorts is quite normal. I almost feel paralyzed – not so much with fear, but with doubt and reconsiderations. Do I honestly want to spend the next four years of my life consumed with school? Is dentistry REALLY where it’s at? Obviously I won’t back out; I’ve worked too hard and really have no other career aspirations outside of music – which isn’t exactly high on the job-security list.

It truly is intimidating though, I don’t feel worldly or confident enough in my own abilities at this point to tackle a profession that caters to human health. However, I do realize that is WHY I get to go to school for four more years – to acquire such skills and confidence.

I do believe the scariest part is the loans though. I have never owed anyone any money – and I’m already taking 50K out through next August (we go year round here). Yea it isn’t as much as many other dental students, but it is not a pleasant feeling.

I still feel like a little kid at times. Most of my friends are in long-term relationships, engaged/and or married and planning careers and starting families. I almost feel as if I’m falling behind the spectrum simply because I got stuck in school and out of the real world for even longer. I’m now going to professional school, hoping for enough free time to meet someone and make friends at the same time. Quite a hefty order for a rather introverted personality-type.

I still have the pre-dental factor going though, where I really have NO idea how hard things will be, but I assume it will be the worst. I guarantee my future posts will be forthright and true to my experience. If I find dental school is not nearly as impossible as others would have you believe, I will tell you. I actually look forward to relaying real experience as opposed to pure speculation…which is pretty much all I have been doing.

This post is quite scatter-brained, but I think it captures what most anyone would and should be going through on the cusp of a major commitment.

I become a D-1 in three days.
Nervous? Yes
Anxious? Yes
Doubtful? Yes
Ready to just get on with it? Hell Yes.

Thanks to all who have kept up with my adventures thus far, I promise I will not vanish forever.